WRITING PROMPT: Write the words.....

WRITING PROMPT: Write the words "I remember..." at the top of a blank page then, without hesitation, write the next words that come to you. Be specific. Write some of the details of what you want to write about, not just the idea of it. As soon as you've completed a few sentences of the image, and before you stop to think of the next, drop down a few lines and begin again with the words "I remember..." and write the next snapshot that comes. Do it again and again until you've filled a page. Each of these "I remembers" becomes a door into a writing session.


I REMEMBER:
The day I got stung by a bee while I was riding my tricycle. I was all by myself in the middle of the trailer court holding my left hand flat. On top of it was a paper towel and on top of the paper towel was a white powdered sugar doughnut. The bee came after the doughnut, got stuck under the paper towel and stung me. I dropped my doughnut onto the ground and started crying. My memory is that I was crying more for the loss of my doughnut than I was for the pain of the bee sting.

I REMEMBER:
The day I accidently shot a little sparrow with the BB gun that I was NOT supposed to be playing with. A friend of mine, Scottie Poe, let me borrow the gun for the day. I stood out in my back yard and aimed at the little bird and pulled the trigger. The next thing I knew the little bird was flopping all over the yard screaming out in pain and I did not know what to do. I buried him alive in a little hole that I dug in haste and worry. I will never forget the sorrow I felt for the bird.

I REMEMBER:
Watching the moonflowers bloom each night with my neighbor Dempsey. I always felt special because my mom would call in my sisters at dusk but she would let me go across the yard into the neighbors' yard where the old man would be sitting on his back steps waiting for me. Together we would walk to his little garden to watch the yellow flowers bloom underneath the street light in the alley. The bushes would shake with life and it was fun to guess which flower would bloom next.

I REMEMBER:
The anxiety of driving out to grandma K's house for our big Christmas party! I knew that Santa would eventually be there. I knew there would be stockings full of gifts and our yearly ornament from grandma. I knew that after stockings we would be visited by santa claus so we all had to run to each window and the sliding glass door to listen for the jingle bells that announced his arrival. I knew we'd all take turns sitting on his lap so we could tell him what we wanted for Christmas. I knew he would give each of us a brown paper lunch bag that had been folded down neatly and stapled shut. Inside there would be an apple or an orange, some peanuts, and a little bit of candy. I knew that on the way home dad had to drive careful because there might be reindeer walking around on the road out.

I REMEMBER:
Waking up at four or five in the morning so Kara and I could be on time to meet the swim team bus. It would be very dark but we would be wide awake and feeling grown up and responsible. We would make sure we had the lunch that we'd packed the day before usually with special snacks that we had walked to the grocery store to shop for on our own. We bought special granola bars, special juice drinks, we bought packages of sweetened kool-aid so we could lick our fingers and use them to dunk inside the blue or green sugar and then suck them dry. We bought strawberry and grape flavored hubba-bubba bubblegum. We packed our lunches, our swimming suits, our towels, our extra spending money and we walked through the cool darkness towards the pool and the park. We could here the noisy rumble of the bus waiting for us the minute we walked out our door, as the pool was only two blocks away. We walked, hand in hand, feeling so responsible.

I REMEMBER:
Seeing my dad cry for the first time in my life the day I left for the first time. He clenched his teeth hard trying to will the tears NOT to come. But they came. I hugged him and I know he didn't want to let go. He told be to be careful. He told me to call them when I got there. He told me to keep in touch. He told me he loved me. And then he did let me go. But only after he told me to call them when I got there one more time.

Writing Prompt: Write a letter to somebody....

WRITING PROMPT: Write a letter to somebody. Think of someone specifically you would have a hard time talking to in person. This could be a love letter, a letter of concern, a letter of support.... be open and honest. Be graphic, be concise; this may be the only chance you'll have of letting this person know how you feel.

If you were to ever read this, you would know
that I am writing it to you. I don't know why
it feels wrong because I have not done any
thing wrong. It's just that you are easier to
write to than talk to; you always have been.

We are the same even though you will never
agree with me and I would deny it if I were
asked. Our lives are as different as night and
day, yet we are the same. We have the same
insecurities, the same needs, the same hurts,
the same desires, the same thoughts.......
whether they are right or wrong. We are only
human after all.

We also have a history. And if history tends
to repeat itself then we are both in trouble.
We share it whether we like it or not. It sits
between the two of us bubbling, festering.
Neither one of us is going to bring it up or
discuss it because it would be awkward and
we both know that awkward will not work for
us. You try hard to please and I try hard to
stay in the background. My days of trying to
please came and went. I just went away. I am
still gone but nobody seems to notice!

Least of all you.

You keep trying to find that magic button,
that magic number, that magic word but you
can't. Maybe you, too, should just settle for
the back row. It keeps you out of trouble for
the most part. But you just put on your face
and then your other face when the first one
doesn't work. You sneak into places you
shouldn't be. Into people's hearts and their
minds and their homes and their private
moments and their memories. You know you
don't belong there but you stay there until
you are about to be found out.

Then you leave. You will only come back
when you are ready. It doesn't matter to
you that you leave people lonely, scarred,
naked and shaking.

You are carrying secrets but you forget
which secrets you tell people so it's always
a guessing game about what you can and
cannot say. You tell people things that you
know you should NOT be telling. Secrets
you know you shouldn't be talking about.
It makes you feel powerful.

I do the same thing.
It's wrong.
But I learned it from you.

Part of me wants to hug you and never
let go because I know that we are the
same. The other part of me wants to run
as fast and far away from you as I can
get and not look back. But you hold a few
tiny, special pieces of me in your calloused
hands that nobody knows or understands.
That's why I love you. That's why I just
stand here with my soft hands hanging
open and awkardly by my side.

You bring out the best in me.
You bring out the worst in me.

I am pretty sure I do the same for you.

Writing Promt: Describe your mood today

WRITING PROMPT: Describe your mood today. Are you happy? Sad? Meloncholy? Angry? Think about a word that really describes you today and write about it. Once you begin, do NOT edit or fix. Just write.

exhausted

When I really thought about what word I would use to describe
myself today my first thoughts were dark, moody, stressed,
overwhelmed...... but I think that exhausted covers all of it.
I feel like I could check into a motel, fall into bed and sleep
for a month or more. I hate being home because it reminds me
of all the things I need to do: the floors need washed, the toilet
is disgusting, there are always dishes and laundry, the puppies
need attention, the kids' rooms are a crazy mess.....and I have a
hard time relaxing when I am here.
I want to go somewhere by myself. I want a nice hard bed to
sleep on with lots of pillows. I want to be able to close the curtains,
turn on the air conditioner, take off my constricting clothes and crawl
naked under soft sheets and blankets that smell vaguely of bleach. I
would love to have the TV and remote all to myself. I would love have
my writing journal laying open on the table and not worry about
others seeing it. I would love to have hour upon hour to write,
unabashed, unabridged, unfettered. I would love room service to
bring me MY food and then take away the dishes when I am
finished. I would love for my phone NOT to ring. I would love to take
a nap in the afternoon without feeling guilty. The thought of
"checking out" of my life for 48 hours outside of my home sounds
like a dream. I don't want a spa or a massage. I don't want to see
or talk to anybody. I don't want to smile at strangers. I don't want
to put make up on or do my hair. I'd come home happy, relaxed,
refreshed, renewed, ready to take on the floors! It sounds like I do
not appreciate my life but I do; I could not ask for a better one.
Although it's easy to get lost in your own life and not be able to find
your way back to YOU. I think spending a weekend in a hotel alone
would help me find ME again.

Yes, I am exhausted.

Writing Prompt: IS THERE SOMETHING ABOUT YOU

WRITING PROMPT: IS THERE SOMETHING ABOUT YOU THAT NOBODY IN THE ENTIRE WORLD KNOWS ABOUT? WRITE ABOUT IT. IF NOT IS THERE ANYTHING ABOUT YOU OR SOMETHING YOU'VE DONE THAT WOULD SHOCK YOUR FRIENDS IF THEY FOUND OUT? WRITE ABOUT IT.

Actually there IS something that I don't think I've told anybody about. Nothing important to anybody but me. The year I lived in the D.C. area I spent many hours wandering through the museums, the monuments, the "mall" area; the places that are notorious for visitors and tourists.

I loved being there because I was a nobody which meant I could be anybody I wanted to be.

I could (and did) sit in front of a Monet painting for three hours and imagine I lived in his world. The streets and sidewalks were full of interesting people, vendors, musicians and I would meander through the crowds and hubbub looking at things, touching things and learning about things that I would never have thought to pay attention to in another life. I REALLY NOTICED and made myself aware of what was going on around me and it constantly moved me. I was young.

Then there were the monuments. In pictures they seem like big boring statues. In reality they take your breath away. My favorite was the Lincoln Memorial. I don't think a week went by the entire year I was there that I did not visit him. It made me feel important just to be in his presence.

One day I had spent seven or eight maybe even nine hours on the mall listening to music and watching people and I knew it was time to go home. But I had yet to walk up the stark and humbling stairs of the Lincoln Memorial so I knew I'd better visit. Getting to where he sits is no small chore. If my memory serves me correctly there are between 90 or 100 stairs. With each step you feel as though you are getting closer and closer to something special. It's very overwhelming. I loved every minute of it. On this day I had decided that when I reached the top I would sit and rest for a bit after such a long day. However when I arrived, there were too many people lolling about so I decided to walk to the back of the memorial which looks out on a major bridge and highway structure. Cars, taxis and busses were busy coming and going. Life was pressing on in front of me while another life was ominous and memorialized behind me.

I sat on the very edge of the monument and dangled my feet over the high edge and looked out on the world. The sun was just beginning to set so the colors were vibrant; bouncing off each other. The warmth of the day was giving way to a refreshing, renewing coolness. Eventually I scooted backwards and leaned up against one of the giant pillars, settling in for the most emotionally powerful nights of my life.

I can't remember what time the monuments were supposed to close; I think midnight. Although for some reason I couldn't leave. I sat there for hours watching the day turn into night. I pondered life. I thought about all the reasons I loved Washington D.C. I thought about my family. I thought about my future, my past, my dreams, my goals. I watched the cars rush by each other in a huff. Their lights all turned into red and yellow bands of moving light snaking around each other, through each other, faster, slower. Nobody in the world knew I was there but me.

I was invisible.
I was invincible.

I believed at that very hour that if I were to have spread my arms out and jumped off that monument that I could have flown. The cool breeze stirred me. It moved me. It pushed me forward. It lifted me to places I'd only read about. I closed my eyes, turned my face into the wind and in my mind I flew away.

It must have been extremely late when I left. To this day I don't know how many hours I spent there and I am sure it was very dangerous for me to be out so late by myself in the city. But it didn't matter. Not that night. I felt more alive than I've ever felt before or since. I often think of the experience and my heart does a little flip. I don't know if it's because I miss the city or I miss the feeling of being both invisible AND invincible. I've often wondered though, had I really jumped, where I would have landed once the winds let me down. I'll never know. But I'll never forget that night.

TAKE THREE: NOW YOU SEE ME, NOW YOU DON'T

For some reason this is my favorite.

I like it for the reason I gave it it's

title. You can sort of see me, but not really. I feel like THAT is how I live my life. I only show the parts of me that I think people need to see. The sweet, smiley, easy-going person when in reality I am not like that at all. I don't want people to know the OTHER me. The girl who is quiet, reclusive, deep thinking. I don't know why. I think it's because I come from a very large Christian family who believes that there really is no reason to be sad, lonely, depressed or broken. Even though I think lots of them are the same way. Often, in society, it's easier to just smile and go about like all is well. But broken is a good word for me.

TAKE TWO: Pretty in Pink

OK, this photo was easy to chose because normally you
would not catch me DEAD in pink and/or purple. I
did a lot of cropping with this one. I was standing with my
favorite grandma because I had knitted her and I matching scarves and hats this past winter.

I just played with the tinting a bit to get this cartoon
like product. I also liked it because it looks like I have
blues eyes and I don't. My eyes are green.

Writing Prompt: FIND THREE EXTREMELY DIFFERENT PICTURES OF YOURSELF

FIND THREE EXTREMELY DIFFERENT PICTURES OF YOURSELF.
Crop and edit them into different styles, looks, colors, text. Paste
them on your website if you can. Write about why you chose each
picture. Do not criticize or critique. Do not edit your writing
although explain why you edited each photo the way you did.
Let your thoughts guide your hand.

Oh my god what could be worse than
looking at pictures of myself! One thing
I discovered during my painful and
lengthy search of suitable photos was
was that there are not a TON of pictures
pictures of just me. That's because I
am always the one behind the camera.
(Note to self: my kids might not like that
someday when I am dead and
gone.)

I am my own worst critic!
But I won't go there this time. I must follow my
guidelines. All I can say is thank GOD few if anybody
will see this post. And to think that I have to do two
more of these.

I chose this picture because I am wearing a version
of a cowboy/girl hat which I have NEVER worn before
or after this particular picture was taken!

One of my sisters and I and a good friend were
messing around one day taking pictures for said
friend's match.com site. So we decided just to goof
around and take a bunch of dorky pictures. I would
NEVER wear this kind of hat in public, that's why it
stood out as something I should use for this exercise.
I also noticed upon further examination that I look
nervous; I loathe pictures. I am not looking at the
camera and I can tell that I am thinking I would
rather be ANYWHERE but right there.

I have zero editing skills, so I just messed around
with the lighting and color until I thought it looked
cool.